Sunday, November 1, 2009

Little boy lost ...



This has been a very difficult day in my house. The tears just wont stop...my little fur baby Toby turned 16 this October 31st but he has been ill for a long time. Eight years ago he had pancreatitis and we were told that he has so little of his pancreas left that he probably would not live much longer...but we made sure all his food was 97% fat free and he kept on keeping on. He was half blind and his hips caused him a lot of trouble too. He had to take pain meds everyday. When we woke up Saturday morning he wasn't doing well. We were sure that nothing had been left down he could have gotten into. So I gave him his doggie meds and waited hoping he would get better but he just grew worse. I kept him tranquilized so he was sleeping most of the time but he was so bad that I knew come Monday morning I would have to take him in to be put down. I last checked on him, gave him more meds and cuddled him up a little after midnight. When I put him back to bed he was snoring quite loud. This morning when I awoke he was gone. My heart is breaking for my little boy lost and I wonder how I will ever go on. He was so special to me because when I lost my son he was there for me. When my hubby went back to work and my other son went back to school, he was still there with all his fuzzy kisses and snuggles of encouragment. It made me go on ...for him, for my family. I do take comfort in that he is no longer suffering and I am also so grateful that I was still here. I had planned to be in California by now but thank goodness I had some medical followups of my own come up that I had to stick around for.

15 comments:

Elaine A said...

Inka Dear,

I'm so sorry to hear about your sweet baby. My heart is breaking for you. I know you will miss him dreadfully, but your heart holds all the wonderful memories that will help you through this sad time. I know exactly what you are going through and it is very hard to deal with. Let the tears come, but know that his spirit will always be with you.

Elaine Allen

Jan said...

Oh my goodness, I feel so so badly for you! Also, I feel good that you were able to be there for him and that he went naturally and you didn't have to take him in to be put down. This has happened to me so many times and will happen again. It is the worst part of having these friends who just can't stick around as long as we do. I wish I had some comforting words for you but I know how hard it is going to be. If you have any desire to have another furry friend I hope you will go out and find one real soon. That is the best way to recover. I'm crying here for you. You are so lucky that you got to have him for so many years, that isn't granted to many of us. Cry all you need to because some day you will find you don't need to cry so often, and some day after that you will only cry on occasion. I am so sorry for your loss. Please take care. I lost my 17 year old cat on Halloween 2 years ago. I'm so glad I was with her at the time. I like to think that all my lost pets are somewhere, waiting for me together, I see them in my dreams. You are not alone.

Anonymous said...

All of us feel your pain.

They take a piece of our hearts when they go.
You will feel better in a while....really. Just remember what a GREAT life you gave him

lori

gale said...

My deepest tears for you.Animals are such a important part of our lives and it is so hard to part with those who have become our dearest friends.
May your thoughts dwell only on the best of times.
Gale

Cynthia (Cindy) Powell said...

So sorry to hear about your loss, I know how deeply we love our companions and what they mean to us. But rest assured, you meant as much to him and you did everything you could to make his life complete.

Carolyn said...

Truly sad, Inka. I'm so sorry but take comfort knowing you gave him the very best care and when it is time, nothing we can do will prevent the inevitable. I still miss my poodle who let me know when the phone would ring or someone was at the door. Memories keep us going forward and new events keep us from falling backwards. Take care of yourself.

Hugs,
C

Lynn said...

Oh Inka, My heart breaks for you. I know how special your fur babies are! Its so hard to let go. He will be in your heart forever and you'll see him again at Rainbow bridge someday. Please please Please bring some pictures of your darlings to the next meeting, you know what
I'm talking about. Now is a perfect time !
hugs Lynn

Elizabeth Golden said...

Oh goodness, I can feel your broken heart. A very wise person once told me that animals were put on this earth to ease our pain and bring us joy. It sounds as if your fur baby did just that. I happen to believe that there is a special place for these little angels. I wish you comfort.

Julia - "Vintage with Laces" said...

Oh Inka, this is heart-breaking! I'm so sorry about your loss. It must be aweful to lose such a sweet long-time companion. I know he will be in your heart forever.

Hugs,
Julia

janene said...

I'm crying with you for your loss. What a wonderful bond we have with our pets. And how wonderful you kept him going so long with your loving care. I know you are remembering the good times you had together and will carry him in your heart, all snug and warm. Janene and my 3 dogs

Johnna said...

Oh Inka I'm so sorry. I can just imagine how you must feel my kitti is 19 and very ill. She was there for me when i too lost my son. How they help us, they just don't know. I'm so sorry.
Hugs and love for you.
Johnna

Anonymous said...

Very sorry to read about the loss of your Toby. Goodness gracious it is so hard to lose our fur babies. Heartfelt condolences.

Hugs!
Bridget

Hels said...

Echoing all that has been said before, I am sending you a big big hug...and I am so sorry to hear of your loss...bless little Toby, he will always be in your heart and will be waiting at the Rainbow Bridge for you...lotsa love hun x

susi said...

I lost my boy 10/30. It was so very sudden - he wasn't sick at all. Kind of makes you understand how quickly life can change. My best to you and your family.

Cinimom said...

I too lost my beloved pet, Tasha, this summer. She was 13. I know how you feel, they become such an important part of the family. I am so sorry for your loss. You will be in my thoughts and he will be forever in your heart.
Cyndi